As I’m about to graduate in a matter of weeks, I have been reflecting on the things I’ve learned during my time in high school. The past four years have taught me many valuable lessons through different experiences. Below, I’ve compiled some of the more important lessons I picked up along the way. Note that these lessons are in no way a criticism of Township; any high school can teach these lessons, but they are important to bring to light, regardless of what school it is. Additionally, all of these lessons can be applied to real life, but I have learned these few specifically during my time at high school.
You determine your own worth.
While not based on importance, this first lesson may be the most valuable out of all the others: you determine your own worth. At Township, there are a plethora of opportunities to succeed, and awards are plenty. I have spent my four years taking upper-level IB and AP classes, as well as being involved in many extracurriculars. As a result, I have often found myself questioning my worth if I don’t meet a certain achievement. However, I failed to recognize that my worth is not determined by an award or achievement. I decide my own innate worth as a person. My worth is not defined by what grades I achieve or awards I earn; I define my worth by my character. Resilience and empathy are much more important than any award I could earn, which is why I work to hone those characteristics each day. Instead of focusing on achievements and grades, think about how you can achieve a better character. Ultimately, my grades aren’t the thing that will determine my success in the real world – it’s my resilience that will carry me through career opportunities and setbacks.
Life is too short to stress about beauty standards.
Another important lesson I learned is that life is too short to stress about beauty standards. While Township is a microcosm of the real world, it is true that beauty standards, unfortunately, exist everywhere. There will always be a ‘new look’ for a woman to achieve, and it is designed to be virtually impossible (as a way to keep companies profiting). The thing about beauty standards that I learned is that they are impossible to meet. Life is simply too short to be worried about if you meet these standards, so I’ve worked to be as authentic as possible. Being true to yourself is the best thing you can do, not only for yourself, but for others. When others see that you are being true to yourself, they can feel safe to be themself, too. Also, being strong and healthy is always infinitely better than being malnourished and weak. Do yourself a favor and take care of yourself, because that will reward you more than achieving any beauty standard will. You are beautiful just the way you are, and a trend that changes every few weeks doesn’t take away from that. Just be yourself, because that is the greatest gift you can give to others.
You are allowed to take breaks and live your life.
This next piece of advice might come as a surprise to many, but school is not everything. You are allowed to take breaks and live your life. This isn’t to say that you simply shouldn’t pay attention or work hard in school; this is for students who work so hard that they lose sight of their own life. I’ve found myself in this position multiple times, and each time, I feel a sense of regret for not spending more time with my family and friends. School eventually ends, and assignments and grades turn into a small part of your life, but family and friends do not just pass after a few years. These connections are invaluable, and it’s important to pause from school every now and then in order to maintain these relationships. There is so much more to life than school, and I’ve found that I perform better academically when I let myself take breaks and spend time with family and friends. Your work is guaranteed to still be here tomorrow, but do not take family and friends for granted. Colloquially speaking, stop and smell the roses from time to time, because burnout just isn’t worth it.
Give yourself more credit and be confident.
As any Township student knows, academic pressure is real. And sometimes, it can be stifling. This pressure can result in being extremely hard on oneself, particularly when it comes to achieving the highest grades possible. Personally, I have struggled with being hard on myself during high school, especially when I don’t do as well as I would’ve hoped on a test, or don’t perform as well as I could’ve. Over time, I found myself becoming my own toughest critic, and as a result, my self-talk was extremely negative, leading to low confidence. This is no way to live your life. Especially in my senior year, I started to look back at all the things I’ve accomplished, and I realized that I needed to give myself exponentially more credit than I had been. Society is always looking to push people (especially women) down, and I wanted to push back and find my own power. Believing in myself and my abilities ultimately got me into a strong school and a selective program within that school, and it is so much easier to be kind to myself than it is to be a critic. There are plenty of critics in this world, and it’s in your best interest to not be your own. The world will try to tear you down, so you need to be able to build yourself back up again. Be confident in who you are and what you bring to the table, and you might find yourself achieving more than you previously thought was possible. Like Elle Woods said, “What, like it’s hard?”
Learn from past mistakes.
One of the most human things is making mistakes. No individual is perfect, but it is crucial to learn from mistakes in order to be better. We cannot spend time simply dwelling on past errors; we must learn from them and recognize how we can be better in the future. Just thinking about the mistakes we made does nothing. But apologizing to those we’ve harmed and reflecting on what we can do better paves the way for personal progress. Own up to your mistakes and move on with more knowledge than you had before. You can’t evolve as a person without making mistakes, because perfection is not progress. Don’t dwell on past errors, but don’t let them take over your life, either. Learn from them and move on.
Don’t be afraid to share your story.
We all go through challenging times, and many of us carry painful experiences with us every day. While painful, these experiences can also be important tools of learning for others. Don’t be afraid to share your story, because you never know who it could help. Being vulnerable is a beautiful and vital thing, especially during high school, because many young adults struggle with mental health. By being open about your story, you can help shed light on issues that are often not discussed in school. More importantly, others may not feel so alone. Speak your truth, not just for your own sake, but for others. Although cliché, you never know what someone is going through, and you have the power to make a real difference in someone’s life. We all have a different life story, but we are all more alike than we are different, and sharing your story (even just a small part of it) can make a true difference in someone’s life.
Be a friend to everyone.
Lastly (but not least), be a friend to everyone. This means everyone, and not just who you think would be cool to hang out with. This means being kind towards every person you encounter. One of the best parts of my high school experience was being on the Unified Track team, where students with and without intellectual disabilities are paired and participate in track and field events. All of Township should embrace this culture of acceptance and inclusion, because it was an incredibly beautiful thing to see everyone feel so accepted. When we feel like we belong, our community can flourish. No one deserves to be on the sidelines, so I challenge you to be a friend to people who you may not know. Sit with someone at lunch who is alone. Reach out to someone in your class who looks like they’re having a hard time. Dance with people who are standing on the outskirts of homecoming. Be a friend to everyone, and watch your community change for the better.
